My Obsessive Boy

Yes, in case I forget to mention the newest obsession of Ethan, it is Harry Potter.  Here is proof:

Mesmerized in Harry Potter.  He is now up to book 5.   So proud of him.

The Remarriage Campaign

As soon as we got home today, Artimus came up to me very cute and sweetly, and said, "Your mother's aunt and I both want you and daddy to get married again.  That's what we want.  Can you marry Daddy again?  Please?"  With her long smile showing her teeth and her eyelashes batting, I couldn't help but laugh.  Daddy took them to visit my grand aunt over the weekend while I was trying to finish a report.  My grand aunt had questioned the wisdom of my decision when she first learned of our divorce.  She absolutely adored him.  I must admit, most older people we meet adore him.  But why this now, after more than four years of separation and divorce?

We talked.

Me: "Do you want me to be happy?"  

Artimus:  "Yes."

Me: "Can you let me choose who I want to be with?"

Artimus:  ---

Me: "What if I fall in love with someone else?"

Artimus: "You cannot marry anyone else."

Me: "Can you let me choose who will make me happy?"

Artimus: "You will marry him?"

Me: "May be."

Artimus: "Then can I be the flower girl?"  

Me: "Yes, of course."

We hugged.

Artimus:  "Can I have the ice-cream now?  You promised."

I have a feeling there will be more of these types of conversations.

JW

Sleeping in the Same Bed

There are true benefits to sleeping in the same bed.  We get to cuddle, kiss, hug and build great memories of comfort and love.  The truth is, we can all remember a time in our younger days when we were afraid of the dark, the stillness of the night, and monsters/ghosts.  We craved the warmth and protection of the superheroes like mommy and daddy.  After all, our bodies dictated that there is nothing better than a good night sleep.

These true benefits to sleeping with parents diminish as the years progress.  At least for the parent, the kids' nighttime spins and karate moves get less tolerable as their size get bigger.  That kick in the head at 4:00 am in the morning is no longer forgivable.  The leg swung on top of my belly no longer felt like a slap but like a punch.  This is particularly true for Ethan, whose bones are bigger and heavier.  Artimus, being female, is softer.  She is also less violent in her sleep.

This morning, I had a revelation.  Even though I love to wake up with them by my side and know that they slept well, I think it's time for them to be in their bed.  Perhaps I can reactivate that fulton I bought that can be laid out on the floor in front of their bunk bed.  I must get Ethan to learn to sleep on his own.  Otherwise, I might begin to feel like a battered mother.  But how can I get upset at a sleeping child?

Artimus fell off the bed last night.  I helped her back on to the bed and she just continued sleeping.  Amazing.

JW

Graduations, Moving Up Ceremonies, and Awards

Yes, Ethan and Artimus are both making me very proud.  Ethan worked so hard in his reading and writing that he is no longer scoring below 50 on tests.  Instead, he earned overall honors in all subject areas, which meant he got above a 90 average on all subjects.  His reading appears to be better than his math now.  Amazing.  He can't help but talk about Harry Potter all the time.  My obsessive compulsive boy merely got a new thing to obsessed about.  For that, I am glad it's about books.

Artimus got honors at school without much effort.  Can you imagine if she actually put efforts into her studies?  She also got third honors in Chinese School, after attending only half the year.  This is also amazing because she is the only one who does not finish her homework in class.  She is smart.  I hope in the years to come, she will learn the value of hard work.

So I am proud of them.  They are my joy and pride.  They make me laugh just by being who they are.

God Bless!

JW

A proud mom!

Artimus at Chinese School kindergarten graduation.

I got a picture of Ethan, barely.  I couldn't even get a picture of him at his awards ceremony.

Artimus, the ballerina with treats from her teacher after the performance.  Artimus looks like a real girl now.  Not my little baby anymore.

Do you see what's in her hands?  She was so happy to be one of five who got honors.  But for the life of me, I have no idea where that little thing went after she got home.  Oh well, less clutter.  

Growing Up Too Fast

I can't believe Ethan is at my shoulder and Artimus is just about five inches shorter than Ethan!  They are growing up so fast I can't remember how they used to be before they were able to talk.  Now, Ethan knows to listen carefully to what we say and to respond in such a way that would please us.  He is also turning out to be quite a chess master - today, he beat me in 4 moves.  I would never have thought that even a month ago.  Artimus, the master manipulator who tells so many detailed stories about everything, never fails to get our ears even though we know she exaggerates.  She is such a good storyteller, and so good at describing what is going on while videotaping with our iphones that it's actually fun to review her videos.  Just today, I dawned on me that she may be a natural reporter.

They warm my heart and fill my days with joy.  They are so simple and so true!  All they wanted each day is to have fun!  They want to play chess, or a family game of Blokus.  They are so competitive that it's actually fun for everybody.  I can't wait to play other more complicated games, like monopoly and civilizations.

Today, daddy took them out to play basketball and soccer.  They were so happy, just like little kids should.  Forget ballet!  We have to trim down so we have more time for the priceless moments of just being together and having fun!

Sleeping beauty, before I had to wake her up for school.

First lost tooth in March.

My camera-shy boy, at the pediatrician's.

Political Beliefs and Our Kids

We rarely argue, JK and I.  We try to have fun with the kids.  But I have been agitated by his high and mighty analytical discussion about cutting entitlement spendings, arguing that it is just so critical for the economy that Obama agrees.  Are we reading a different newspaper or watching different TV outlets for news?  But hey, he reads my NYTimes!  Yeah, I agree to entitlement cuts too, but sensibly and fairly.  After all, people receiving these "entitlements" like Medicaid and Medicare really need the help. Did he forget that you would have to have no money in the bank and so sick you would die if you don't get medical help?  The working poor gets so little by way of social security income that what they get they have to spend.  So how is cutting that going to spur the economy?  Still, I agree we need to cut some in order to balance the budget.  I don't think the Democrats or Obama disagrees.

Today, in the car, I loudly told JK to stop talking to me about this topic because we fundamentally disagree about the role of government and the source of today's economic ill.  He said I should show the kids how we can debate this.  What?  Debate this?  I asked him to tell his mother, father and two brothers who all receive some form of social security income and medical assistance from our government that they understand these entitlements would be cut big and they should totally understand why - it should not matter that they use every dime they get and still live very poorly and they have to live together in a very tight space.  Then JK got really mad at me.  The kids were very quiet in the back of the car, listening.

Hypocrisy is hard to tolerate.  Those who are superrich lost touch with being human and being humane.  I could see how it happened - the superrich live in a world completely apart from those receiving government assistance.  But for a middle class person who could be at the brink of needing government assistance should an illness befalls, to side with the interest of the rich is just not smart.  Is this simply stupidity like not knowing his self-interest in this whole debate?  Or is his self-interest so distorted that he doesn't see where he lies in this debate?

Yes, entitlement programs need to be improved so there would be less abuse.  But this very concern should apply more so to those entitlement programs the government gives to corporations to "build" the economy.  While all working people contribute to social security and medicare during our working life, corporations do not do the same.  We earned this "entitlement" of social security income and medicare when we retire.  Entitlements received by corporations are gifts that the government hopes would generate economic growth.

In my view, arguments are fine.  Kids need to see that their parents could argue but could still interact as reasonable people who care about each other.  I can only hope that they would grow up thinking critically about their lives and what is going on in the world.  I hope they become good responsible citizens who would give back rather than become people who care less about the sufferings of others.

JW

Another Year Older

I am happy to be where I am, in case you are wondering!

Chinese New Year Snow Storm

I think for the kids, the snow storm was more exciting than Chinese New Year.  The moment snow fell from the sky, they were screaming, "Snow, Snow, let's go sledding!"  It took a snow storm to make it possible, as they discovered.  This time, the storm was perfect - it was enough snow in one day to create enough snow for the fun.  So they were out there for HOURS.  Yeah, 4 hours!  Hunger and starvation didn't stop them from sliding down that slope again, and again, and again, and ...

Artimus and her neighborhood girlfriends!  Artimus loved being in the lead!

Let's do it again!

We did it again, hooray!

Ethan was the real adventurer!  Here, Ethan was coming down at top speed with the orange plastic toy bat to break the speed, which was totally ineffective.

A Beautiful January 2013 ... So Far

Just a brief recap ...

Daddy's birthday is a still a day to celebrate with a Christmas tree!

Artimus and her tall and strong daddy!

We painted together for the first time as a family.  

Mixing paint is such a science to Ethan.  Artimus just loved the pretty colors!

To Ethan, the fun is in the mixing, not the painting.

I wish I could claim they are avid readers.  But when up close and personal, they were not reading and imaging the images.

I am making the biggest toy Mommy ever gave me.  I am almost done.  Do you see that?









 I figured it out.  Yes!

Getting Older

I got a text from my sister tonight, with news I never wanted to hear but I know was coming one of these days.  She reported that dad's health is deteriorating fast and that I should call her.  Guilt set in instantly.  Last Wednesday, a text from her warned that mom and dad were both down with the flu, and the whole household is sick.  So I kept the kids home on Friday night and didn't follow the ritual of visiting my parents for dinner on Friday nights.  I had wondered about dad's health when he had to fight the flu while diabetic and a serious smoker.  But distance helped because the problem is not at sight.  Now, with that call, it felt quite close to home.

Dad is apparently diagnosed with stage 2 kidney disease.  I had asked him in the past two to three months why he looked so much older recently, and that he looked more yellowish.  His response was typical, "Nothing. Everything is the same.  Can't worry about everything."  Now that I know why, I am a bit upset at myself, and at him.  I feel helpless.

I had known from watching my older colleagues talk about taking care of their aging parents that my day would come sooner than I would want.  I don't know how to approach this problem.  But I am sure between my sister and I, we'll work something out that will help my parents get old comfortably and hopefully happily.

And while my parents are getting old, I am getting older.  I asked Ethan if he would take care of me when I get old, just like how I am taking care of him now.  He was silent and looked away.  I got really mad.  Just earlier that night, I had accidentally kicked the dishwasher and my foot was bleeding from broken skin.  Artimus instantly looked for bandate and neosporin.  Then out of the blue, during dinner, she said that she and Ethan should take care of mommy when mommy gets hurt just like how mommy takes care of them when they get hurt.  Ethan was silent again.  So I asked Ethan if he would take care of me.  All he said was, "I am thinking!"

Great.  Just great. 

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

How many times have you caught yourself asking, "Wow, can't believe another year has almost gone by!  I thought I just celebrated Christmas yet Christmas is here again!"  Well, yes, it's here.  Like you, I am looking for viable New Year resolutions.  Whatever you may come up with, the attempt to accomplish them would have gotten you further than if you had no goals for the year.  So join me in making achievable goals that will better ourselves. 

Happy holidays and Happy New Year!

JW

My Joy

She is truly my joy.  At the sight of a camera, she smiles and gives off the most contagious inner happiness!

 

Daddy is at the computer explaining to me about Princess Sophia,

a Hispanic princess.

 

Wow, mommy is taking pictures!  You like my glasses-look?  (It's not real.  It's just mommy's old glasses.  Daddy took out the lense and let me play pretend.)

 

 

Interesting ...

 

 

Mommy is taking pictures again ... it's so hard to focus but mommy said just pretend she is not there. 

Fish at the Market

 

 

The day after the Aquarium, we walked by the fish market and there they were, unable to walk away from the fishes just taken out of the water. 

There are fishes we go look at in the Aquarium, and there are fishes we eat.  I think it must be a strange feeling to have to draw this critical difference for city kids - we need to protect but we need to eat them!

At the Aquarium with Old Friends

Despite Frankenstorm, we went about our day as normal.  The Aquarium was still open on Saturday. So we headed out after being invited.  Why not?!  It's better stimulated with all the fishes and friends than go home to fight over the legos or have to do homework. 

 

Do you se the fish tank behind me?  I am eating all the free candy at the Aquarium. 

 I love Halloween!

 

 

Look what you find in a pirate ship?

 

 

We are just throwing balls at this board to hit targets.  We missed most times but it was fun anyway!

Beating Lung Cancer for B

Today is an amazing day - fresh air and clear blue sky for the Breathe Deep Walk to Stop Lung Cancer.  It has been a while since I felt so good about being a part of a fight for something meaningful.  I guess because lung cancer, and cancer as a whole, has hit so close to home.  Today, we walked to stop lung cancer because a young and beautiful friend, "B", has gotten this terrible disease despite never having smoked.

We breathe deep for the joy of being able to do so.  We breathe deep for those who couldn't.  We did so today in celebration of an awareness that this particular type of cancer is in dire need of money for research.  

I hope you can join us next year!  Here are some photos:

Leave Drawings

The latest thing in art class was rolling a crayon horizontally on a white paper over leaves.  They loved it.  So they collected the falling leaves on the street and continued their creations at home.  I was inundated with leave drawings everyday last week, which I was instructed to bring to work and to post them on my office wall.  I had to yield to their pride and respond with absolute joy to those sparkling eyes waiting for the hug, kiss, and the, "Oh, thank you, my love!  It's the most amazing drawing I have ever seen!"  Well, they knew it was an exaggerated thank-you.  But they sure still want more of that.

The big leave!

Collecting more leaves to draw more pictures for mommy!

Creating from Loose Legos

After hundreds of dollars spent on legos sets that they could build from following several pages of instructions, we discovered that loose lego pieces offered a lot more room for creativity and excitement. They loved the loose pieces.  Ethan was not very happy with his jar of loose pieces, which did not offer as many colors or shapes.  Artimus was quite happy with hers but basically made what Ethan made with more color options.  Trade would have been in order, if Ethan was not so impatient with bargaining.  He just wanted what he wanted right away.  On the contrary, Artimus liked to take her time to think things over, which almost always ends with, "No, I don't want to trade," or "No, I don't want to share my legos."  So just imagine the frustration Ethan displayed, which turned into threats and later grab-and-run.

Despite the whining and heated moments, they still had lots of fun as bros and sis ... comparing their creation.

Me and my lego car.  

I created this lego truck.  I got six wheels.  Artimus only had four.  Yay!

Look at our creation!!!!  Thank you for thinking of us and getting us these incredible legos!!!

Reminders of Love

 

One morning, when I opened up my bag upon arriving at my office, sticking out was this blue card, full of hearts and butterflies ... and us!

 

 

I miss them so much on nights I don't have them. But just as I was turning off the lights to sleep one night, there stood these little hand-painted sculptures Artimus did just the week before.  They stood there by the lamp on my dresser, in such carefully thought out positions.  They just cheered me up and reminded me that she is always with me and thinking of me.

 

Do you feel the love?!  She knocks me off my feet everyday.