Self-Determination

As a parent, knowing where to draw the line of who makes the decision is a growing process.  While Artimus embraces almost anything, Ethan resists just about everything.  Artimus loves her piano lessons and swimming lessons.  Ethan resists practicing piano but doesn't mind going to lessons.  He would bang his head till it cracks before he would touch water in a pool.  And I hear more negative comments from him than I can bear.  Is it me?  Or is it boys?  Or it is him? 

I am determined to let Artimus and Ethan learn the things that I wish I had the opportunity to learn.  But it seems like Ethan is determined to not learn how to swim.  Do I respect his determination?  Or do I help him overcome his fear of water?  As an adult, anyone who asks me to jump from higher grounds might as well asks me to commit suicide - because it's not about fear; it's about why I have to experience such high level of distress.  I ask myself similar questions whenever Ethan resists swimming lessons - will he be missing sooooo much if he doesn't know how to swim?

I must say, it's still so much more pleasant to hear enthusiasm for learning.  Artimus would come up to me and say thank you, just like that, for letting her play piano and learn how to swim.  Then she would say, "I want Ethan to swim with me."  Oh well.  May be she will come up with better ideas of how to get Ethan into the pool.

JW